Sea Change

Well, I meant to blog about my amazing journey to Thai-fluency, but I just never seemed to have the time. If I had to describe the last few weeks, I'd use the word "contemplative." This has been one of the less stress-filled times I can remember; and when I think about the hyper-drive lifestyle I'm going back to in two weeks I shudder a little.

I've thoroughly enjoyed living in Madison. It's a beautiful city, and in some ways it feels more like home than Raleigh does, in part because I've had to walk everywhere here so I feel a part of Madison. All in all, it's been very low key and in the moment. I've enjoyed not being a grad student all the time. I've also enjoyed Skyping with friends and family that I no longer see very often. (Missing Philly always.) As my time here in Madison draws to a close, I've been thinking about what it means to be connected. For me, I have realized that when I leave, I usually assume I am still connected to some people, but I get so busy I don't bother to always let them know this. (The flip side of this is when I try and realize they don't care as much as I do.) I'm not consistent. I want to do better at with at least being honest about that. I've been very surprised and grateful that some of my Philly peeps want to stay in touch consistently too. Valuable lessons, all around.

I've resisted thinking about Raleigh, but this week a shift happened and now I'm heading that direction again. Hopefully the hyperdrive will not be as overwhelming as I think it will; after this summer I have a clearer idea of what I want to do in terms of research, so now I need to commit to an advisor and start planning. Fortunately I have two weeks left in Madison to come to terms with that and hopefully find a little more peace and balance. Big decisions, big fears.

I presented part of my thesis at the SEASSI Student Conference, which was highly intimidating but went pretty well, I think. It generated some interested, according to the pings from Academia.edu. I am more confident in turning thesis baby into an article or two, but I might need a little more time before I love it again. Maybe I never will. But I do love Thailand, and I'm excited about the possibilities I see for returning there.