ee cummings (or E.E. Cummings or however his name is supposed to be) is another poet that I love. That particular poem, which I am too lazy to look up the original printing info for, is like a prayer to me. When I was inducted into the English Honors Society in college, we were asked to bring our favorite poem with us to the fancy schmancy dinner to share. That is the one I brought. I was very proud/happy that one of the professors, who was a department favorite and had been there FOREVER, brought the same one.
Everything feels kind of distant, but real. I can't actually remember what I started out to write in this post. I suppose this could be a good thing. I think, I think, what I feel, which is weird and I don't really trust it, is, that everything will work out. I feel this much more peacefully than I think I have ever felt before, and it comes from the knowledge that no one thing will make me happy. I grew up thinking that there was "one right path" for my life, and through prayer and supplication, I would find my way and walk in it. This led to me being absolutely terrified that I was doing the wrong thing, and worrying that if I stepped off the right path, I would forever regret it and be unhappy and it would be all my fault. So knowing that I could potentially do many things, interesting things, things that I would not have thought about but might be cool, is freeing. I guess I just wish I knew what exactly I will be doing next. But again, underneath, I feel like something will work out. It probably won't look anything like I was expecting. And that will probably be okay.
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